i often struggled with my love for my wife. i adore my bride and have an unquenchable desire to be with her. but... she has trouble making intimacy a prioity. she loves me very much, but doesn't always show her love. this is a strange thing that a woman would be the unromantic one in a relationship and the man would long to be "cuddled", but it happens. i am always looking for some way to spark her interest in showing passion. i have been listening to death cab for cutie (my prize for being 10,000+/- on spiltwine) and they have written some words that i feel say a tremendous amount about true love, commitment and passion.
"i will follow you into the dark"
love of mine some day you will die
but i'll be close behind
i'll follow you into the dark
no blinding light or tunnels to gates of white
just our hands clasped so tight
waiting for the hint of a spark
if heaven and hell decide
that they both are satisfied
illuminate the NOs on their vacancy signs
if there's no one beside you
when your soul embarks
then i'll follow you into the dark
in catholic school as vicious as roman rule
i got my knuckles bruised by a lady in black
and i held my tongue as she told me
"son fear is the heart of love"
so i never went back
if heaven and hell decide
that they both are satisfied
illuminate the NOs on their vacancy signs
if there's no one beside you
when your soul embarks
then i'll follow you into the dark
you and me have seen everything to see
from bangkok to calgary
and the soles of your shoes are all worn down
the time for sleep is now
it's nothing to cry about
cause we'll hold each other soon
in the blackest of rooms
if heaven and hell decide
that they both are satisfied
illuminate the NOs on their vacancy signs
if there's no one beside you
when your soul embarks
then i'll follow you into the dark
then i'll follow you into the dark
death cab for cutie from the album plans
4 comments:
That is such a great CD. I am glad you are enjoying it. And the Answer is NO. I will NOT come over to your house and Cuddle with you while listening to Death Cab. There are just somethings I wont do.
TAG! You're it
I was reading your recent blog post and something you said struck me because my significant other has pretty much said the same thing verbatim about me. I just thought I'd comment in case it helps. I am certainly not adverse to cuddling but it never even crosses my mind because I'm too stressed out taking care of the daily responsibilities of life (working 12 hrs a day, cleaning when I get home, making sure the bills are paid, the taxes get done, and the stove gets fixed and his mom gets sent a birthday card etc). If my guy would take some of the load off my shoulders so that I could relax, I think he'd see a lot more cuddle time. And with passion- before passion comes emotional intimacy and how can I feel passion when I don't even see him and when he only takes care of himself?
~blogcafe
anon-first, thanks for reading. second, i am not saying that i do dnot understand the demands of life. i try very hard to share the responsibilities the best that i can and i am willing to do anything that is asked of me. my need is not an endless need for sex or something that takes effort. i am simply talking about even just touching (i.e. swinging a leg over or an arm and maybe nuzzling her head against mine and whispering that she loves me.) i feel that i am very attentive to my wife and i am the one who has asked "what needs to be done" to help you with the day to day so it is not allowed to consume our relationship. i feel that it is important to address this lack of intimacy because it will ruin a marriage if it is left unresolved and is a strong reason for infidelity. all of us want to feel needed and most importantly wanted. if these basic needs are not met one will seek that affection elsewhere.
i really do understand your point and i appreciate your candor, but unlike you husband (which btw, i am sorry for) i do not only look out for myself. my wife needs and need to lighten her daily load is extremely important to me. i would hope that your husband will see your struggles and make an effort to take some of the load so you will feel better about appreciating and wanting him as a man.
if you check out my other blog germs you will find a good nuber of thoughts about my relationship. not all are regarding my wife, some are the past.
good luck to you.
Post a Comment